….are you sure about that?

It is 4:29 in the morning and gratefully I am awake after five hours of sleep. God usually whispers “Come with me” at this time. This morning He and I will discuss the COVID-19 vaccination. Again. Our appointment is at 8:15. Today is the day. We comply with the government’s request to take this preventive measure.

No, I am not sure about this.

Our household of three had COVID in December of 2020. Of the three of us, I am the one with lasting side effects. My eyesight was weakened. I am also the one whose immune system and health history make me more vulnerable to take anything “experimental”.

For me the more the government pushes this vaccine the more I hesitate. Why?

Simple, no one can be trusted to speak the truth. Certainly not Dr. Falsely. (Misspelling intended). Nor the CDC or WHO. Neither can government officials. My own health care providers listen to my concerns and reply with the same assurances. Like every one is reading the same cue card. The risk is minimal, take the vaccine.

By nature I am a rule keeper. But, this time I am unsure. Let’s be frank, the whole COVID experience is fraught with too many questions and too few answers.

For all those assuring me the risks are minimal I wearily reply that they themselves have no idea what it is like to be in that small percentage. I do.

Herd mentality is aggressively pushing us to shut up and take the shot, get in line again and take it again. Oh, and be prepared to repeat the process in six months to a year. Wear a mask, wear two no three masks! How selfish to even think about non-compliance. I am not prepared to be an obedient cow on this. Are you?

What I am sure about is God not allowing evil to prevail. I am confident He knows the future and that He will walk me through whatever the outcome of this vaccine is for me. I am reminded that the moments and minutes I live and breathe right now at 5:18 in the morning are miraculous. I have been on the literal edge of death before and God chose to spare me for this morning.

He is trustworthy. By His very nature He is not a liar. When that needle slides into my arm later this morning I am sure that my Heavenly Father loves me and is with me. Plus, if He does not want me to take the shot He will clearly show me this too.


…how is the virtual world treating you?

Readers, I am 56-years-old. Learned to use a computer in college. Back then I was amazed at the word processing because I was a writer. Now I am still a writer, but I am coaching the computer and word processing to come up without updating.

Not a gamer. When gaming systems hit the living/bedrooms of people’s homes I was paying my own bills and couldn’t afford one. By the time a friend was upgrading theirs, gave me one, it was two systems behind and I was working full-time and going to seminary. No time to play.

Since I am retired on disability (not by choice), my laptop, lousy internet service, word processing and Microsoft and Google is a true love/hate relationship. This is where the virtual world gets me.

People need connection. At least I do. Virtual reality connections feel “shaky” to me. Looking someone in the eye to get a sense of their integrity still feels uncomfortable. My mind keeps reminding me that we’re all behind computer screens.

Last evening I participated in a “once we were employed there” reunion. A weak internet connection was a struggle. But, I attend my counseling sessions on the phone and that works for me. In both cases I knew everyone involved.

Therapy by phone with the same therapist I had going into the COVID-19 shutdowns works because I had done all the face-to-face groundwork already. I knew everyone at the reunion too, long ago made those connections. The difference lays in the technology of accessibility to the internet. One-on-one connection by phone glitches are remedied quickly. There is no quick fix to the internet issues during during the virtual reunion.

A blog about internet choices is fodder for another blog topic.

Virtual reality treats me unequally based on my location. My location is based on money and safety. Enough said for today. Until next time, I’ll leave the solar powered light on for you. 🙂


…what positive actions can be taken in a disturbing world?

" 'Do you think I came to bring peace on earth?  No, I tell you, but division.  From now on there will be five in one family divided against each other, three against two and two against three.  They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.' "

"He said to the crowd, 'When you see a cloud rising in the west, immediately you say, 'It's going to rain,' and it does.  And when the south wind blows, you say, 'It's going to be hot,' and it is.  Hypocrites!  You know how to interpret the appearance of the earth and the sky.  How is it that you don't know how to interpret this present time?' "

" 'Why don't you judge for yourselves what is right?  As you are going with your adversary to the magistrate, try hard to be reconciled to him on the way, or he may drag you off to the judge, and the judge turn you over to the officer, and the officer throw you into prison.  I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.' "  (Luke 12: 49-59 NIV)

Yes, this may very well be a strange verse to highlight as a path to positivity but right now I find they can be. Jesus spoke these words. They were a warning about being so concerned with reading the signs of weather, the earth’s appearance that considering the signals and signs of humanity’s being is left aside. There is also a warning about being more concerned with arguing, fighting with your fellow citizen than with what the consequences of being arrested or taken before a judge might be.

I propose that doing just what Jesus tells us to do are the most positive things we can do during this time. It’s not easy. Life on this imperfect Earth brings problems. To all of us. I don’t think the most wealthy persons on the planet or the poorest are without problems.

Jesus even tells us that He did not come to Earth to bring peace during His first visit. He never forgot that His first appearance here was to be followed by a second. At the end of the second, He would usher in peace. Meanwhile, between the two, even the most loving of families would be divided.

He didn’t name what the divisions would be but I read it with the understanding the Lord meant just about anything. If we’re honest with ourselves, families are split over a huge variety of issues, problems and beliefs. Religions and politics, social situations/concerns/issues and how to resolve mankind’s differences all top the list of what divides families. Splits occur in families, friends, neighbors, churches, marriages, countries, cities, states and governments.

The most positive thing we can be doing right now is also in this passage. Judge for ourselves what is right. You can’t make a discernment if you don’t know the truth. The whole truth. God’s truth.

As a teenager we attended a Missionary Baptist Church. (I speak ONLY for my experience with this particular church and her beliefs, not all Missionary Baptist Churches.) Our pastoral leadership were firm believers that if you were a willing vessel God would put the words in your mouth. Problem was, often that experience was through cloudy or misunderstood doctrine or scripture. Or tradition.

I was taught a considerable amount of weak or outright wrong church doctrine. I openingly participated in church discipline where members had “fellowship withdrawn” from them. There was the belief that modest dressing meant dresses. Along with that women were not allowed to speak in church business meetings or hold church office even when there were no qualified men to do so, and the only Bible I was allowed to read was an authorized version of the King James Bible.

Imagine my surprise when in college I began to learn differently. The first time I just didn’t feel like going back for Sunday night service because it meant putting on pantyhose, a girdle, dress and appropriate shoes. When I honestly expressed that to the woman I was with she was shell-shocked.

Then she explained I could wear pants and God would be okay with it. I agreed to try but was a nervous wreck walking into the church that night. I was sure God was going to strike me with lightening. He didn’t. Now I couldn’t tell you what the sermon was about, because I was too busy hunkering down, but I learned a great lesson. Maybe what I had been taught wasn’t quite right.

In truth it took years to rid myself of all the bad doctrine and false teachings from those teenage years. I had to learn what was right for myself, not just because someone told me this was what had to be. Later when I taught young people I wore them out saying, “Read your Bibles, ask questions, know for yourself what this book says.”

I say the same thing to you now. If you want a way to stay positive, do positive things during this troubled, angry time, read God’s book. Know what it says. Read it in a translation that goes back to the original scriptures and is translated into a language of today. If you’re new to reading the Bible, start with the New Testament. (The Old Testament is about living under the Law, the New Testament is about living under Grace.) Don’t automatically assume whoever is teaching you is always right. Don’t be fooled that those who are successful by man’s standards are successful by God’s standards. The pulpit shouldn’t go to the highest bidder. KNOW FOR YOURSELF.

Our relationship with God is the most intimate, personal relationship of our lives. It requires knowing Him and nothing is more positive than cultivating that relationship in the right way.

Give away your despair, your hurt, your sadness. Give it away simply by doing for someone else. Is there a neighbor you can chat with in their yard or your yard? Did you bake chocolate chip cookies and share them? Did you put your heart and mind into something creative to do with your children that will give them and you a wave of hope for the future? You don’t have to spend a penny, give it away right out of your heart through your hands.

Prayers for positive actions and beliefs in your lives,


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